A Big Joke
by erika-jules
Summary: Me and my friend had nothing to do, it's just a joke... thought you MIGHT enjoy it... It sucks, but he he, just for fun!


EMILIES STORY ABOUT BEVERLY HILLS 90210  
  
I don't really know when this starts. They are in high school. This is kind of a joke. Brenda never went on the first date, meaning they are not together. Brenda don't care, haven't thought about it. Dylan is totally head over heels in love with Brenda. Kelly has gotten a thing for pies and is trying to make Donna tag along with it. Steve is in love with David but has not got the guts to tell him, or anybody.  
  
(Kelly's pie songs and pie fetish is inspired from this site, the songs is also from here: www.weeble.jolt.co.uk ) , Kelly is walking down the halls of West Beverly.  
  
Kelly: (singing) sexy moma! Where is my pie? Huug.. megg! Quergh... haaaauuuuuorrrrrgh..!  
  
Donna: lo Kelly!  
  
Kelly: lo donna! Ya have pie?  
  
Donna: ......  
  
Donna: yes!  
  
Kelly: me like pie!  
  
Donna: yes!  
  
Kelly: pie is goooood!  
  
Donna : mmm pie.  
  
Kelly: mmmmmmmm.... Pie.  
  
Donna: mmmmm pie.  
  
Kelly: Pie, pie, pie, pie, pie, pie...  
  
Donna: mmm pie.  
  
Kelly: ......  
  
Kelly: PIE!  
  
Donna : I am made of jelly. (donna says bending her knees)  
  
Donna: see?  
  
Kelly: k.  
  
Kelly: I need to do a toilet.  
  
Donna: go to the bathroom then.  
  
Kelly: but what about the scool germs?  
  
Donna: there are no germans here!  
  
Kelly: no... the germs!  
  
Donna: oh...  
  
As Donna and Kelly disappears into the bathroom Brenda walks by. She is looking beautiful, as always. Dylan spots her.  
  
Dylan: Brenda! Brenda!  
  
Brenda: Hey Dylan...  
  
Dylan: Hi... how are you?  
  
Brenda: I'm great, how are you?  
  
Brenda says and turns to open her locker.  
  
Dylan: I'm great, now that I'm here with you...  
  
Brenda takes out her books, slams the locker door shut and looks at him.  
  
Brenda: And what is that supposed to mean?  
  
Dylan: I think you know what I mean...  
  
Dylan tries to seduce her.  
  
Brenda: No I don't...  
  
Brenda looks at him weirdly and continues to walk down the hall, Dylan follows her.  
  
Dylan: well you see... (Dylan is trying to find the right words)  
  
Dylan. Its means that you remind me of a sofa... hehe! With chips and cookies on it!  
  
Brenda: I love going to the movies!  
  
Dylan: k...  
  
Brenda: T- shiiiiiiiiiiiiirrrts...  
  
Dylan: haaaauurgh... hhhhuuurrghhhh.. (Dylan says while admiring Brenda) Brenda: lovely...  
  
Dylan: Kiss me Brenda! I want you so much!  
  
Dylan takes her in his arms and kisses her. She kisses him back. The kiss is starting to get intense and Dylan pushes Brenda against his locker.  
  
Brenda begins to tickle Dylan.  
  
Dylan: ha ha ha! Tehehehehee! Nooo.. nuuuuwh! It tickles! Haha, don´t!  
  
Brenda stops to tickle Dylan...  
  
Brenda: aaaw...  
  
They both start smiling dreamy at each other, until they hear an angry voice yelling: ah..! you are like a total bitch!  
  
Brenda: what was that?  
  
Then they hear another female voice: shut up a´ ya face!  
  
Dylan bursts in to laughter while Brenda has a weird look on her face.  
  
Dylan: You're so cute...  
  
Dylan kisses her.  
  
Brenda pulls away. She is curios about who was yelling. She can see Brandon and Andrea coming out from The Blaze office, fighting.  
  
Brandon: That is not an exuse!  
  
Andrea: What the hell do you think I care?!  
  
Brandon: I don't know Andrea, AND I DON'T CARE!!!!  
  
Brandon walks away and Andrea walks the other way.  
  
As Brenda is still staring at the "event" Dylan is kissing her neck. He is in heaven right now, he loves this girl more than anything and after million of turn downs the past 6 weeks or so she is finally kissing him back.  
  
Brenda: Brandon!  
  
Brenda walks after Brandon. Dylan is left behind looking confused... He smiles to himself, very happy with what he got and settles with the thought; what he gets might continue to grow.  
  
Brandon is walking towards the parking lot, Brenda comes running after him.  
  
Brenda: Brandon! What's wrong? What happened?  
  
Brandon stops beside his car looking up at Brenda.  
  
Brandon: Andrea just ate my one and ONLY delicious apple flavoured jelly bean!  
  
Brandon puts his hand on his forehead. He looks like he is going to cry.  
  
Brenda: what? That´s what it is about?  
  
She looks weirdly and confused at him, like she is about to laugh.  
  
Brandon: oh Brenda! You know how much I love those? I´m addicted to apple flavoured Jelly Beans, you know that Brenda?  
  
Brenda: uh...  
  
Brenda is still looking weirdly at Brandon.  
  
Brandon: ah! Come on, Brenda! Please just like try to understand.  
  
...  
  
Brandon: could you at least like stop looking at me like that, like just for a sec?  
  
Brenda: pfffffffffffth..! uh... yeah... right ( she laughed, wiping her hair away from her face)  
  
Brandon: looks disappointed at Brenda. She is looking around like she's in a hurry to get back.  
  
Brandon: b – bu.... But! Brenda! Ah..! (Brandon says nervlusly in a sqeeky voice, trying to hold back the tears)  
  
Brenda: oh GOOOD!(Brenda walks quickly away in embarrassment)  
  
Dylan comes out to talk to Brandon.  
  
Dylan: I am so going to nail your sister!  
  
Brandon: WHAT?!  
  
Dylan: She just kissed me! It's all going up from here!  
  
Brandon: Don't talk to me about Brenda like that, she's my sister!  
  
Dylan: Oh, yeah, ok sorry... what happened with you and Andrea?  
  
Brandon: She took my last apple flavoured Belly Jean man!  
  
Brandon starts to sob again.  
  
Dylan: Oh man!  
  
Dylan feels bad for Brandon.  
  
Dylan: You can have one of mine...  
  
Dylan pulls out a little plastic bag of apple flavoured Jelly Beans. Brandon looks at him with shock.  
  
Brandon: I can't accept that...  
  
Dylan: I insist...  
  
Brandon: really..?  
  
Dylan nods and hands heroicly over a apple flavoured Jelly Bean. Brandon takes it and eats it with a thankful look on his face.  
  
Dylan: Now can you please give me some advice on your sister?  
  
Brandon: Well... We can sure make a plan somehow, but I tell ya, if my sister ain't interested, she ain't interested... She's a very stubborn girl...  
  
Dylan and Brandon walks back into West Beverly.  
  
Donna: Hey Brenda!  
  
Donna and Kelly runs up after Brenda as she is walking through the halls.  
  
Brenda: Hey Donna! What's up?  
  
Kelly: We were just wondering if you would want to do something with us this weekend? Come to my place, eat pie or something?  
  
Donna: Yeah, pie!  
  
Brenda: Yeah alright!  
  
Kelly: Jey! Donna, wana go pie shopping after school? You know for the weekend?  
  
Donna: Yeah sure! Hey Kel, why won't we make it a sleepover? Me and Brenda can spend the night? Eating pies 'till the crack of dawn...  
  
Kelly: Yeah, sure.... Great idea Don  
  
Brenda: Yeah ok...  
  
Kelly: So how is it with you and Dylan now?  
  
Brenda: I kissed him back today...  
  
Donna: Oh my god! What does this mean?  
  
Brenda: Nothing... It's not as if I'm in love or anything... I just think he is sexy... I guess I just like to play with his feelings...  
  
Kelly: Oh you're bad! You're so bad Brenda!  
  
( Chris is a popular jock that goes his senior year at West Beverly. The gang is juniors, but Brenda looks like she did in her senior year... Just wanted to point that out, because she was soooooo beautiful then. He he, in this story Brenda is wildly popular and is ruling the school)  
  
Chris: Hey Brenda beautiful!  
  
Brenda: Hi Chris...  
  
Chris: Wanna do something this weekend?  
  
Brenda: Can't, got plans...  
  
Chris: Oh ok, how about next weekend?  
  
Brenda: Tell you what? I'll give you my number and you can call me?  
  
Brenda writes her number on his hand, smiles at him and walks away. Chris walks over to the rest of the jocks and brags his ass off. The guys can't believe he got Brenda Walsh's number. She's the goddess of West Beverly.  
  
After school is finished Brenda walks outside to the parking lot to wait for Brandon to come out and take her home. Brandon finally arrives after about 10 minutes with Dylan.  
  
Brandon: Hey Bren, I have something left to do at The Blaze so Dylan will take you wherever you want to go, ok?  
  
Brenda: Yeah ok, whatever... Where's your car Dylan?  
  
Dylan: Follow me!  
  
Dylan looks satisfied and smiles a thank you to Brandon before he walks away with Brenda. Dylan stops at an orange van with pink foot prints on it.  
  
Dylan: oh yeah! look at my van, man!  
  
Brenda: umh... heh lovely... (she says with a fake smile. Dylan goes in the car after Brenda...)  
  
Dylan: soo... where do you wanna go, Brenda?  
  
Brenda: I promised Kelly and Donna to sleep over for pie eating? But anyway, just drive some where I wo'nt be seen in THIS CAR...  
  
Dylan: man, relax! This car is dope!  
  
Brenda: yeah... like whatever-pie.  
  
Dylan: are you sure you don't wanna come over to my place... I mean, instead of eating pie with your other chick friend?  
  
Brenda: Exactly what are you suggesting?  
  
Dylan: Well... I don't know, it's up to you  
  
Dylan smiles at Brenda with a sly smile.  
  
Brenda: Where is your house?  
  
Brenda suddenly finds him extremely attractive. She feels like she is actually starting to feel a little thing for him. It's very small, but still...  
  
Dylan: I can show you?  
  
Brenda: Yeah ok...  
  
Brenda smiles at him and looks around in the van. It's actually kind of cool. Dylan is chilling in the couch. Brenda sits down next to him, really close. Dylan looks into her eyes. It's like he is in a trance.  
  
Brenda: Shouldn't you be driving?  
  
Brenda says seductively, moving her face a little bit closer to his. Dylan can't manage to speak at first.  
  
Dylan: Maybe...  
  
Brenda: And what is that supposed to mean?  
  
Brenda is moving so close her lips are only one inch away from his.  
  
Dylan: I don't know...  
  
Brenda quickly pulls away from the trance and speaks. It all happens so sudden Dylan "didn't even know what hit him."  
  
Brenda: I think you should  
  
Dylan: Yeah... Yeah... ok  
  
Dylan says while collecting himself and walking up to the drivers seat. Brenda lies down on the couch. She lies on her back, looking up at the roof. Dylan constantly checks her out in the mirror every 5 seconds or so.  
  
Donna and Kelly is at "Pie Store". They are pie-shopping.  
  
Kelly: Don, what kind of theme should we do on our pies?  
  
Donna: we could have like berry pie?  
  
Kelly: or toilet pie! Mhmmm... mmm  
  
Donna: boy. Am I hungry for pie!  
  
Kelly: cool.. I have tottelottely got the hots for pie!.  
  
Donna: PIE-woman.  
  
Kelly: ya know someone should start Pie Hut!  
  
Donna: yeah yeah... but lets get to the case here... berry pie, right?  
  
Kelly: YEAH baby YEAH(she imitates austin powers) piiiiiiiiie´s gonne rule the scool!  
  
Donna: Banana...  
  
Kelly: I wonder what Brenda is doing now... hmmmmmmm... she propably like totally on the toilet right now!  
  
Donna: I don't think so, rumour is, she disappeared in a car with Dylan!  
  
Kelly: Oh my lord! Do you think she's got the hots for him?  
  
Donna: I don't know, but I couldn't understand how she doesn't... I mean, EVERYBODY has got the hots for Dylan McKay!  
  
Kelly: That's true alright, but he's got the hots for Brenda Walsh... Ironically she is the only one that doesn't like him back...  
  
Donna: I know, I feel bad for him... Do you think that's why he likes her? Because she is the only one he can't have?  
  
Kelly: No I don't think so... I remember talking to him just after they had moved here, he told me he thought she was the cutest thing he had ever seen.  
  
Donna: Awwww... I really hope they get together, don't you?  
  
Kelly: Yeah I do... I'm sure they would look really cute together...  
  
Donna: Yeah I know... But Chris wouldn't stop bragging about getting Brenda's phone number... Do you think she likes him?  
  
Kelly: I don't know... I hope not, I hope she falls for Dylan. I have never seen him in love before...  
  
Donna: I know what you're saying girl! I couldn't agree with you more...  
  
Kelly: Now that is what I'm talking about!  
  
Donna: What? With Brenda and Dylan?  
  
Kelly: No, this pie... It's in XXXL...  
  
Donna: Wow.... That's some huge piece of pie!  
  
Kelly and Donna continued to fill up their cart with pies for the rest of the evening...  
  
Dylan: This is it...  
  
(Dylan lives in the bungalow he lived in towards the end of "The Brenda Years")  
  
Brenda gets out of the van.  
  
Brenda: Wow... This is not bad... Not bad...  
  
She says halfway to herself. Dylan locks the van and comes up after her.  
  
Dylan: Thank you  
  
Brenda: I´m hungryyyyy!  
  
Dylon: abra kadabra, Bren!  
  
Brenda fallows Dylan into the house, and he shuts the door.  
  
Dylan: come on in, I'll show you my room.  
  
Brenda: yeah ok... but first, where is the bathroom?  
  
Dylan: it's in there. Ill go with you!  
  
Brenda: I don't think that's necessary. I just have to check on my make up...  
  
Dylan: Oh, your make up looks fine... You don't have to check it...  
  
Brenda: Oh, but I want to...  
  
Dylan: Ok, I'll be in the kitchen...  
  
Brenda checks her make up and goes to the kitchen. Dylan smiles at her as she enters the room. Suddenly she feels a little sting in her heart. Has she fallen for Dylan? She suddenly feels the urge to kiss him. She walks up close to him.  
  
Brenda: What'you doing?  
  
Dylan: Nothing  
  
Dylan says with a sly smile.  
  
Brenda: Ok  
  
Brenda whispers as she looks into his eyes... Dylan moves a little closer to her and kisses her. She kisses him back for the second time. The kiss gets more intense, when Brenda suddenly stops kissing him...  
  
Dylan: what's wrong?  
  
Brenda: I think I like you Dylan.  
  
Dylan: I think I like you to!  
  
Brenda kisses him again and they stand in the kitchen making out for about half an hour until Brenda's cell phone rings. She answers the call as Dylan kisses her neck.  
  
Brenda: Yeah?  
  
Kelly: Hey Bren, I hope I didn't interrupt anything... *giggles*  
  
Brenda: No not at all, so what's up?  
  
Kelly: Well, the clock is about 18:00 so when are you coming to my place? Donna is here already...  
  
Brenda: Oh ok, well, I can come now if you can come here and pick me up. But you have to take me home so I can get my stuff, deal?  
  
Kelly: Yeah ok, we'll take off now, you're at Dylan's right?  
  
Brenda: Yeah, see you in a bit!  
  
Brenda hangs up the phone and Dylan kisses her. He says, in between kisses:  
  
Dylan: What was that?  
  
Brenda: Kelly, she's coming to pick me up  
  
Dylan: Why?  
  
Brenda: I'm gonna stay at her house this weekend, so is Donna...  
  
Dylan: oh...  
  
Dylan says disappointed.  
  
After about ten minutes Kelly and Donna arrives at Dylan's place. They walk up to the door and peeks in. They see Brenda and Dylan making out in the couch. They giggle a little and rings the door bell. After a short while Dylan opens the door.  
  
Dylan: Hey Kelly, Donna.... What's up?  
  
Kelly: We are here to pick Brenda up? Is she ready?  
  
Brenda: Yes I am...  
  
She walks out the door to join Kelly and Donna.  
  
Brenda: Bye Dylan...  
  
Dylan pulls her in for a short kiss and then she leaves. He stands in the doorway to watch her disappear.  
  
In the car Donna and Kelly is asking Brenda all sorts of questions about what they saw.  
  
Kelly: Is he a good kisser Bren? As good as piiiiie?  
  
Brenda: it´s like lemon pie!  
  
Kelly: Wow... he has gotta be a good kisser!  
  
Donna: ugh... don´t think so. Lemon pie? Toilet pie is the best, Bren!  
  
Kelly: oh please, don´t speak of such things Donna! You´r giving me goosbums! (ell no)  
  
Donna: and a terrible hunger, huh?  
  
Kelly: oh yes...  
  
Donna and Kelly: LIKE FOR PIIIIIIIIIE!  
  
Brenda: Yeah ok girls, let's chill alittle , k ?  
  
Donna: *giggles* Yeah ok...  
  
And then they died. 


End file.
